LETTER TO THE EDITOR: Hmmmm...That Smell

Rossland Telegraph
By Rossland Telegraph
March 19th, 2009

Dear editor,

I was walking along Centennial Trail the other day and as I approached the water treatment plant from a westerly direction, I was enveloped in the smell of shit, and not very good shit, I might add! Where could this smell be coming from, I asked myself? My suspicions were immediately aroused by the presence of an intrepid snowshoer ploughing along about 30 metres ahead of me.

Perhaps, I thought, in the quest for a beautiful body, vibrant spirit, and general feeling of wellbeing, not to mention a great bowel movement, she had doubled up on the bran nuggets, chased with a quart of pro-bio lactose-free whatever-that-stuff-is, and finished off with a couple of power bars just to fill that last tiny gap, and as a result, had a little rumblyo in the tumblyo.

But wait a minute, I thought. We all have a jungle tummy once in a while, but is it possible for a human to emit such noxious fumes? And if it was that poor girl, would she have had the nerve to be in public, about to self-combust? Not likely. Okay, thinks I, what can it be, and is it really that bad? Maybe I should rustle up a smelly-o-meter. No luck there. Undeterred, I made my way to City Hall; perhaps they could shed some light.

And to my amazement, they did! ‘Oh THAT smell, ha ha ha! Yes indeed, and wait ’till summer, when it gets REALLY bad!’

So, adventurers, whenever you are walking, jogging, biking, skiing, snowshoeing or otherwise enjoying Centennial Trail, and you catch a whiff, cast not a suspicious eye at your fellow enjoyers, but be happy to know that the nasty smell is actually sewage merrily farting its way from Red Mountain to Rossland.

Sterling Silva

Categories: Op/Ed

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